MAGIC NIGHT AND HANGOVER HASH
29th NOVEMBER 2014
Congratulations to everyone involved in this hilarious evening of magic and mystery!
Some Hashers always misunderstand the dress code. Whatever was Bookend thinking?
Tom was Down! Downed! He looked cautious as this was his first taste of alcohol - would he like it?
The first ‘Magic Act’ - making two pints of beer disappear.
Rosie tried to smuggle goods into Britain but ‘Customs Man’ Wellie insisted on a full body orifice search. So, it was with a mixture of trepidation and excitement that Rosie dropped his trousers and bent over for Wellie’s probing.
“Hmmm. There are two large obstructions to be moved before the examination can start”
“Well, that explains the musical farting noises Rosie has been making!”
“This looks familiar - just one tug and it’s out”
“I thought so! The Wellington boot I threw through the window of The Red Lion!”
“Five hundred yards of bunting! That would have jammed up Chickerell’s sewerage system if I hadn’t got it out!”
Souffle looked happy. It was his birthday the following day - 78 years young. He and BOF were hard at work on a small ship off the Scottish coast when the picture below was taken in about 1970. Neither of them has changed a bit...
Bumblebee tips a pint of beer into Bookend’s ‘Magic Hat’ to see if he can make it ‘disappear’ without spilling a drop.
Bumblebee hopefully waited for some beer to fill his glass but it was clear that Bookend has had years of experience at drinking out of magical top hats.
L’Ass Over Tit made a very delightful assistant when she climbed into Bumblebee’s superbly hand crafted coffin. Two of her assets were much admired as she climbed into the coffin - her bravery and her self-composure.
Bumblebee seemed to particularly enjoy this part of the performance but, being a gentleman, he closed his eyes - very briefly!
Bumblebee’s attempt to cut L’ass Over Tit was performed with enthusiasm and a blunt saw. When blood dripped from the coffin the audience screamed - for more!
“What’s that you say? Sh*t! The ambulance is stuck in traffic?”
BOF can’t believe his eyes!
Phew! She’s back in one piece again. Dorchester A&E Department is amazing!
A good meal was provided by the venue before we were astounded by the Bookends performing their spookily brilliant mind reading act.
Messages were passed by telepathy between the Bookends with the aid of simple kitchen equipment - a breakthrough for men everywhere who struggle to know what women are REALLY thinking when they say things like “You know perfectly well what’s upsetting me!”
Nobby was blindfolded and Hashers then paraded around him and he had to describe what they were wearing and carrying.
Nobby accurately described, using the power of thought transference, that it was Organgrinder wearing pink plastic French Knickers and a bobble hat who was posing next to him. Amazing!
Bandit was on next with his amazing ‘Broken Watch’ trick. He borrowed the hugely valuable Rolleks watch presented to Des De Mona on his retirement. Bandit queries whether that’s really a genuine article with that spelling on the watch face. Des insists that it is genuine because his work colleagues bought it in Thailand at a street market and the seller provided a Certificate of Authenticity.
The watch was popped into a bag and duly smashed to pieces by Jim Jams.
Bandit was horrified to find that the trick had gone wrong and offered Des the pieces back with a fiver compensation to buy a replacement.
Next a great ventriloquist act with Sonic and H5N1
Sonic volunteered to do this act because it was the first chance this year that he had to get the last word in a conversation with H5N1.
“Concentrate Please! There are 1....2....3 matchboxes on the table. When you had got that we will move on to counting up to four.”
Is romance in the air as Bumblebee puckers up?
Hey! No tongues!
The magic never ended as ABO spends the evening dancing with an invisible woman.
The Hangover Hash set by Organgrinder and BOF lived up to its name by having a Main of only 4.5 miles with an optional short cut taking off a mile. This was in sharp contrast to the Main two weeks previously which was out 2 hours and 40 minutes!
Despite this being a short Hash ABO moaned “This is like a Wessex Hash!” This prompted Bianca from The Wessex to give ABO a Down! Down!
Half-Mad was briefly awarded a Down! Down! and the Dopey Hat for taking off his red T-shirt to make himself unattractive to some frisky horses. The hat was then passed to BOF for twice getting an electric shock from an electric fence - now that’s real short-term memory loss!